Percipio….

Everything used to be normal for Drew… or atleast for the past 20 years…
She was never close to anyone…no besties.. no girls gang…noloveinterests .. an almost perfect child with average grades from an average family. She had applied for a college and her name was on the list but the acceptance letter never came… she waited and waited…finally enquired impatiently only to be notified that she never applied in the first place…there was “no Drew on the list” they said.
Drew was sad. she comforted herself, blaming it on the computer for the error, stating that she will work hard and get it next time, let’s do some part time job while we are at it.
She got job at an old bookstore, helping the ancient store keeper sort and arrange. Shewould sometimes
feel the near blurry eyes staring at her, giving her creeps. But one evening after sorting a new pile of books at the inner corner, she found the door locked
from outside. She blamed it on the old man..” at his age it’ s normal to be forgetful” she thought.

There was no way to contact anyone, so she waited for the sun to rise again…The old shop keeper opened the store at
9am punctually.. his eyes glanced around the shelves as if looking through Drew who was standing infront of him. Before she could ask anything, a cheerful young man came in and the old man went on explaining his duties at the store, telling him not to slack of just because he was working for an old man.. Drew stood frozen, listening tot the same banter she had heard when joining, staring at these people who were treating her like air..” what about me?” she asked, her voice almost cracking with an unknown fear. The young man was startled and turned around to ask”did you want to work here too?Pity I got the job first. Better luck next time”. The old man’s eyes still skimmed past her, as if.. as if she never existed in the at the first place. Drew was shaken. The fear still made her shiver. Standing at the end of line waiting for her turn to order, she tried to make sense of what she
experienced. “It’s because he’s too old.. yes.. too old” she mumbled as she stepped forward to place her order.
The girl at the counter took a glance at the door and shouted to the kitchen “no more orders”. “I.. I am here..” Drew said to the girl.. her voice now a
whimper.. but the girl walked away
A teary eyed Drew stood at the intersection.. people were rushing around her, living their fast paced lives. sometimes they bumped into her, but no apologies or curses were uttered… Taxis zoomed past her as if not seeing her trying to flag down one. So she walked to her home…

“It will be alright.. I am totally fine..” she tried to comfort herself again. Walking along the creepy road with streetlights flickering every few steps Drew hastened her pace. Her shadow also flickered in an unsynced way.The porch light was on when she reached home. A warmth slowly flooded inside her heart. The doorbell rang for quite awhile before the door got opened.

But there were a pair of blank eyes that greeted her. Her mother poped her head outside trying to see the culprit who dared to prank them this late in the evening.
“Mother..” she wispered.. but there was no response.. the door was soon closed with a slam. Drew started tormenting the doorbell again, sobbing
as she said over and over “no.. it can’t be.. not them too..”
This time the door was yanked open from inside and two burly figures stepped outside shouting threats at
the person who dared to do the same prank twice. “Father Brother…” She called.. but their gazes were never on her. Just as they turned around to go back insisde, Drew slipped inside her home.
She looked at the family of three sitting around the dining table.. looked at the three chairs and three sets of tableware..
She tried to recollect the last time they ate together.. it seemed so long now..

She would usually miss eating together with them and just stuff herself
with whatever leftover in the kitchen and fridge. she would directly go to her own room whenever she came home never stepping outside .. so she never
noticed the change..

“Why do you keep the porch lights on this late? No wonder we get pranked like this”, her brother complained.
“I don’t know…it seems to be a habit..”, her mother replyed.
Drew watched as her family continued to dine and talk.
“I am here..look at me..can’t you hear
me…mom.. dad.. please look at me.. please” Her shouts slowly reduced to sobs.. she desperately tried to hold onto them.. as if trying to hold on to the last strand of rationality in her, only to see her hands adding through.
“No.. no.. this isn’t happening.. not to me… please…. not me…i.. I can’t not exist… I.. I can’t… I haven’t had enough…. please.. not Mee..” she screamed as she rummaged through the albums searching for proof.. For the proof of her existence.. for the tiniest proof that she was also living in this world… that she was alive.. and had spent 20 years with everyone else..
But why was there no Drew on the albums.. no Drew in the class photos.. no Birthday party pics of Drew..why?

“May be there was no Drew in the first place..” a tiny voice wispered in her mind.
No.. no Drew.. in the first place..?
She sat on the floor, looking at the dust and cob webs that had accumulated in her room… no it wasn’t her room at all..
The cold seeped into her body making her shudder in the warm autum night…
“Can there be no Drew…?B.. but I am Drew.. right? How can there be no Drew then.?”
“Are you sure..?” The tiny voice came again, a bit louder this time….
“Sure.. I am sure.. but why is there no Drew here.. Am I not Drew?..” “There is no Drew…. there was never Drew.. Drew never existed in the first place…” The voice got louder, saying the same thing in a loop, making her head buzz, slowly shattering her reason.
“Yes… There was never Drew in the first place.. Drew never existed… I am not Drew then….” She wispered
back to the voice as her mind shattered..
“Who am I then..?” She asked in reflex, as if to hold onto something like a drowning man…
“You are nothing more than a body controlled by me.. your thoughts were never yours in the first place… it was what I made you think… what you
lived was what I made you live… you are nothing more than my puppet.. one among many… for me to play with… puppet….” The voice soothed her with a chuckle.
“I am just a puppet..” she wispered over and over” a puppet to be manipulated….

**************************************

“Project percipio.. trial 2045 on body 25567 successfully completed…
Please enter the details you want to feed into the body…must include a name or number for
addressing…”

A mechanical voice echoed in the
underground lab.

– A stroy by Akhila D. For more stories from the author check her instagram @Wayfarer_scribbles.